Meh..

Arggghhhhhh……

I’m feeling angry. It’s a wave and I just have to ride it but boy I’m seeing red. Stupid. Poxy. Cancer.

I’m angry at the enormity of the task in hand.

I’m angry about the fact that I’ll get poorly again.

I’m angry that I’ll have to leave my children.

I’m angry that they’ll have to lose their Mum.

I’m angry at the unfairness of it all.

I’m angry at how people react to the diagnosis. How they disappear.

I’m angry that this afternoon I had a frank conversation with my oldest daughter about planning my funeral.

I’m angry for friends that are going through this too.

Why me? Why us? Why them?

Xx

5 thoughts on “Meh..”

  1. It’s ok to get angry sometimes, but I’m sorry it’s making you feel rotten. We have so much to be angry about but don’t want to waste our precious time being angry. I send you a big hug and hope tomorrow is a better day

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I just don’t know what to say, Emma, but didn’t want to read and run. Ride the wave. Shout and swear. Know that we all love you and admire you, but I can’t for one moment imagine what you go through just to function each day. xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hi Emma,
    Sounds as though anger is raging at the moment. Like you say, it will pass.

    I’ve removed myself from FB so I feel a little out of the loop in where your journey is taking you.
    My own mother is terminally ill with the big C. She doesn’t have long left with us. It’s very sad for all of us trying to make the most of the time left. Emotions run high and it’s really easy for me and my siblings to snap at each other and forget we should be supporting each other.

    Be brave Emma x I’m thinking of you and your family and friends xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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